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Posts Tagged ‘sexual abuse’

Tolson 4 TEARS Sees Signs of Child Molestation

February 12th, 2010 No comments

The following may indicate that a child has been molested. However, children do not always demonstrate obvious signs, but may do or say something that hints at the molestation. These signs are not all-inclusive and may have other explanations. Contact a health care provider, therapist, or counselor. Some information is from Center for Missing & Exploited Children

BEHAVIOR CHANGES

  • Excessive crying
  • Extreme mood swings
  • Fearfulness and/or bravado
  • Withdrawal and/or rebellion
  • A fear of certain places, people or activities

SLEEP DISTURBANCES

  • Nightmares
  • Bed-wetting
  • Fear of going to bed
  • Inability to stay asleep
  • Desire to sleep during the day

EATING HABITS

  • Over or under eating
  • Refusing foods once enjoyed

SEXUAL ACTIVITY

  • Acting out with inappropriate sexual actions
  • Showing an unusual interest in sexual matters

BODY APPEARANCE

  • Bruises, rashes, cuts, limping
  • Multiple or poorly explained injuries
  • Pain, itching, bleeding, fluid or rawness in the private areas

DAILY PERFORMANCE

  • Sudden change in grades
  • Changes in toilet-training habits
  • Sudden change in relationship to school/play mates

TELLING

If a child tells, believe him/her. Children do not have a frame of reference to make it up.

Prepared by Lynn C. Tolson, author of Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story

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Tolson/Beyond the TEARS reviews “No Secrets, No Lies”

November 6th, 2009 1 comment

No Secrets, No Lies: How Black Families Can Heal From Sexual Abuse by Robin D. Stone

The author of is a survivor of sexual assault. She has been an editor for Essence magazine, The New York Times, the Boston Globe, the Detroit Free Press, and Family Circle. She also teaches journalism at New York University. This impressive writing experience is evident in her clear, concise, compassionate, and culturally enlightening work: No Secrets, No Lies. Throughout the book, Stone offers “Fast Facts” in the margin, adding relevant material to the readers’ knowledge. Stone cites her sources in an extensive “notes” section. She also offers a valuable resource list and index.

Stone offers case examples in each chapter. We read about Kim, who was molested by her stepfather until she was nineteen. Kim learns that a relative had sexually abused her mother. This addresses the frightening fact that perpetration is all too often generational.

The author incorporates the limitations placed upon Black survivors. However, Stone encourages counseling: In chapter four, Stone suggests methods to finding “African-Centered Healing.” cultural starting point for the study of African people.” Stone then shares Rhonda Wells-Wilbon’s Aya Model: Ten Steps Toward Healing” for a culturally sensitive method.

Review completed by Lynn C. Tolson, author of Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story

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Tolson/Beyond the TEARS at Sexual Violence Library

November 3rd, 2009 No comments

Author Lynn C. Tolson is proud to announce that her memoir

Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story

is listed at the

NATIONAL SEXUAL VIOLENCE RESOURCE CENTER LIBRARY

The National Sexual Violence Resource Center serves as the nation’s principle information and resource center regarding all aspects of sexual violence. It provides national leadership, consultation and technical assistance by generating and facilitating the development and flow of information on sexual violence intervention and prevention strategies. The NSVRC works to address the causes and impact of sexual violence through collaboration, prevention efforts and the distribution of resources.

This library database contains the library collections of both the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC) and the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Rape (PCAR). A default search allows you to search both collections at once. You may also search just one of the collections at a time, through the search options location field.

Although the NSVRC library is a non-lending collection, we can provide you with selected resources from our library. Please contact us for more information.

Please contact the NSVRC with any questions about searching the database, or locating helpful resources or referrals.

Phone: 877-739-3895, 717-909-0710

Email: resources@nsvrc.org

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Tolson/Beyond the TEARS: RAINN

September 28th, 2009 No comments

Tolson/Beyond the Tears recommends RAINN ing TEARS

RAINN Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network

What is RAINN? See videos at the site

The Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network is the nation’s largest anti-sexual assault organization. RAINN operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline and carries out programs to prevent sexual assault, help victims and ensure that rapists are brought to justice.

RAINN offers online hotline 1.800.656.HOPE

safe, secure, free, rainnlogoconfidential 24/7

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Tolson/Beyond the TEARS & Self-Injury

September 19th, 2009 1 comment
YDNW

YDNW
“The drops of blood are just like the tears I should cry, but what I can’t cry.”

This statement is from a victim/survivor of abuse who harms herself. If you want to know more about the correlation between abuse and self-injury, check out

You’ve Done Nothing Wrong

The site is created by a young woman who used self-injury as a means to cope with sexual abuse. She dedicates her time and energy to educating about abuse and self-harm. You can read others’ stories, learn alternate ways to cope, find support and awareness. I’ve never met this woman, but I know her pain. I am proud of her for sharing her story so that others know they are not alone. She shares my mission for the Project for TEARS: Telling Everyone About Rape & Suicide, so that no shed tear is wasted.


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